


Let Your Hair Down

by AtraEris



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Bisexuality, F/F, Female Solo, Lizzy - Freeform, Sexuality Crisis, f/f - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-03
Updated: 2018-02-03
Packaged: 2019-03-13 04:56:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,028
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13563291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AtraEris/pseuds/AtraEris
Summary: Lydia struggles with her sexuality and her feelings. She had her chance at happiness with John. No one gets a second shot, right? She knew what she wanted and who she was then, but now? She isn't so sure. Isabelle is there to show her it's OK to let your hair down sometimes.





	Let Your Hair Down

[ ](https://imgur.com/KEO2Jxw)

 

Lydia understood. Really, she did. It was beautiful to see the feelings Alec held for the warlock. But she’d be lying if she said it didn’t hurt at all. She’d lost her chance at happiness when her fiance died. All she had left was her duty and her job and she had thought that perhaps since Alec felt the same they might eventually be able to make it work.

She wasn’t naive. She didn’t think that he would fall in love with her, but it was a chance for a respectably distant companionship. A serious option that would allow them both the distance but companionship they desperately needed, with someone who understood the work would always come first. She hadn’t realized until recently how lonely she’d become.

John used to be there. He used to be the person she told everything to, the person who fulfilled her need for human touch with hand holding and hugs and just brushes of skin. How long had it been since she’d even touched another human being?

She had been lucky to find John. She couldn’t imagine pushing that luck enough to find someone else who would desire her, would set her skin on fire. She knew a simple partnership was all she was able to hope for now. She looked on wistfully as Alec lost himself in Magnus. God it was hot- the chemistry, the passion. She could see Alec’s hands curled in Magnus’s jacket wanting to pull him only closer. A wistful sigh left her lips.

Izzy stepped forward to her side. “Lydia,” she said softly reaching for her shoulder in compassion.

Lydia shook her head, pulling up her usual no-nonsense demeanor. “Don’t worry about it Izzy. I understand.”

She was strong and professional, handling what she needed to do before she held her head high and walked back to her room. She wanted to get out of this dress and just curl up in her sheets.

Maybe she’d actually open that bottle of champagne she had for the occasion. No one was here to judge her and she could surely use the drink. As she came to her door, she was surprised to see Izzy leaning against it. Isabelle’s eyes were dark and sharp and a small smile tugged at her lips. “I thought you might want some company,” she said.

Lydia looked at her for a while, calculating assessing, before conceding and nodding, “Yeah, OK.”

Lydia opened the door and stepped inside and Izzy innocently reached out and ran a hand across the bare skin of Lydia’s shoulder. “I’m sure you’ll need some help getting out of this dress.” Lydia whirled around in surprise as Izzy shut the door behind her with her heeled foot.

Lydia’s eyes narrowed at Izzy in suspicion. That had sounded, very close to innuendo. But Izzy’s face was innocent and bright as she swept across the room to the bottle of champagne. “No use in letting this go to waste,” Izzy said popping it open and pouring 2 glasses.

Lydia sat down at the vanity table and reached up to begin taking her hair down. Izzy put a glass of champagne in her hand instead and took over removing the pins with delicate fingers. Lydia took a deep drink of the champagne, the bubbles tickling her throat. “So, you’re really OK with Alec and Magnus.” Izzy said nonchalantly.

“They are in love,” Lydia said wistfully. “They deserve it.”

“Well, I want what is best for my brother of course,” Izzy said as she freed a section of Lydia’s hair and let it tumble to her shoulder, “but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t happy about the way things turned out for more selfish reasons.” Lydia shivered at the sound of her voice and their eyes met in the mirror.

“Isabelle,” she said softly before setting the champagne down and turning around to look at the other girl. “I thought we talked about this,” Lydia said.

“No, you talked yourself out of this,” Izzy replied reaching out for the piece of hair she had released from the updo letting it slide through her fingers barely brushing Lydia’s shoulder with her knuckles. Lydia’s eyes shut involuntary and a shiver ran through her at the light touch.

“Izzy,” Lydia began, “I’m not…. I don’t…. We can’t….”

“Why?” Izzy said softly. “Because you’re a girl.” Lydia blurted out.

“You’re a girl and I am not a lesbian. I had a fiance. I loved a man. I…I don’t…. I can’t… I’m not attracted to you… like that.”

Izzy laughed sweetly and knelt down to be level with Lydia placing her hand lightly at her jaw. “Tonight, when you watched Alec go to Magnus, I saw it in your eyes. I saw how much you wanted that touch again. Wanted to be wanted. I want you Lydia. What’s wrong with that?”

Lydia sat speechless for a moment an internal struggle driving within her. “Do you not want me too?” Izzy pressed closing the distance between them to be a mere few inches apart.

Lydia’s eyes darted from Izzy’s dark eyes to her ruby red lips and she inhaled sharply, “I…. I….. I don’t know,” she confessed finally.

Isabelle nodded and backed away. She went around to behind Lydia and continued to take the updo down. It was torturous. Izzy’s hands in her hair so softly and delicately unpinning and un-restraining the perfectly coiled updo. Lydia could feel the tension in her head releasing as each pin let her hair tumble free. She let out an unconscious sigh of relief.

As the last pin was released, Izzy reached under and shook Lydia’s hair out running her hands through the strands and spreading her hair across her bare shoulders in soft waves of amber. Izzy stepped away and came back around to face Lydia. “For the record,” she said downing her glass of champagne, “you looked amazing tonight, but you’ve never looked sexier than when you let your hair down.”

She set the glass down and headed to the door. Izzy paused, her hand on the doorknob. “You know I’d never push you into anything you weren’t ready for Lydia,” she said with conviction, “But know that if you’re ever ready, I’m here. Take a page out of my brother’s book, stop letting everyone else tell you what you want and need.” She smiled at Lydia. “Let your hair down more often,” Izzy added as she opened the door and left, closing it with a definitive click behind her.

It was too quiet in the room now. Quiet and lonely and cold. Lydia turned and looked into the vanity mirror. Her hair was down. Her hair was down and free and it felt good. Maybe, as long as it was here behind closed doors, it would be OK to let her hair down like this from time to time?

She took a deep breath and could still smell Izzy’s perfume lingering in the air. She closed her eyes, the events of the evening playing across her mind. She could admit that when Alec had left her at the altar, it had actually been a huge relief. Personally, she had already had her chance. She had chosen the one she loved and lost them and there would be no one else now.

So it made sense to marry for career and security and name. It was better than being alone. And it had been a relief to realize that Alec wasn’t and wouldn’t become attracted to her. It saved them both the awkwardness. It could have been the perfect situation. They were in it for the same reasons.

And then the scene of Alec kissing Magnus came into her brain. It was sexy. It was sexy and beautiful to see the fire between the two of them. To see the hunger and need, raw and obvious in their touch. She could remember that.

Lydia could remember John and how every time he would brush his hand against hers it would send shock waves against her skin. How she was hyper aware of him when he was close and how she felt like a magnet pulled to him sometimes for his comfort and warmth.

She lay back on her bed with her eyes closed. It was her wedding night. Everything said that tonight she was supposed to be loved. Tonight she was supposed to be worshiped and adored. Her mind wandered to John and how good he felt against her. His hands on her skin and the look in his eyes when he knew they were alone and he had her all to himself, his pupils dilated and his eyes dark and hungry.

It was a fantasy she was used to playing in her mind. She sighed. Her brain automatically conjuring up the familiar image. John- his hands in her hair and the pressure of his body over hers as he captured her lips, tongue exploring her mouth. She felt his lips ghost over her bare shoulder and nibble at the shell of her ear. Lips pressed to her collarbone and trailed to her throat.

Dipping lower to follow the heart shaped line of her dress as hands ran over the curve of her hip. She stood and reached behind herself, pulling the zipper to the dress down and shimmying her way out of it. She was still in her bridal lingerie. It had been more for the aesthetic and proper lining of the dress than anything else, but it was still damn sexy.

She laid back down on her bed, the feel of the cool sheets against her flushed skin a luxury. She thought about the raw need, the ache to touch someone, to be as close as possible until you felt like you would fuse into one being. She remembered the heavy tension in the air that weighed against your skin, the electricity of lust mixed with the weight of genuine adoration.

She trailed her hand down her body, her palm gliding down the lace of the corset as she reached to touch herself through the silk underwear covering her sex. She pressed at her clit, which was already a bit swollen against the silk covering. Tracing the pad of her finger around it in a circle before brushing up and down against it. She let out a breathy sigh, her eyes closed and her thighs parted to the open air of the room.

Mimicking the ghost hands of her partner with her own as she tweaked her nipple and wound the pad of her finger quicker around her clit arching unconsciously as she drove herself forward. Her breath coming heavy as she pressed harder and faster, her movements becoming less concise and controlled as she lost herself to pure sensation and fantasy. Just a little more, her mind pressed the fantasy further.

Lips at her rib cage, tickling and light against her skin, slipping down her side in tiny pecks and nibbles stopping briefly at her hip bone to bite more roughly at her skin. “Just let your hair down,” she heard against her skin. Lydia’s back arched up against the phantom teeth, silken hair against her thigh, nuzzling lovingly against her, breath against her sex -cool in comparison to her damp heat- before a mouth latched against her clit sucking and tonguing her to climax.

Her hand reached to tangle in the long dark hair, her voice crying out as she tipped over the edge, “Oh, Mmmm, Izzy, yes!” Her eyes flew open and her hand shot up to cover her mouth in surprise. The scent of her own arousal reaching her as she realized what had just happened.

It had been John. It had always been John. He was her love, the person who set her body on fire. But tonight, had been something else. Tonight, there had been someone else. In its race to ecstasy, her mind had called up long dark hair, silken against her thigh and ruby red lips pressing against her rib cage until she came quicker and more fiercely than she had in a while. Isabelle. She had wanted Isabelle.


End file.
